This post was inspired by a deep coaching conversation I had with one of my amazing clients. He wants to master self-discipline, find the willpower to be more productive, and do the things he knows are essential to his life and his family’s business.
If you’re like him in that, you want more out of life but struggle with self discipline, follow through, and carry guilt that you’re not living up to your fullest potential: This post is for you.
In eighth grade, I had an incredible teacher who was passionate about Greek mythology. She told the story of Ulysses, the captain of his ship. His boat would sail past the Sirens, whose songs would cause the crew to lose control of their minds and crash the ship onto the rocks.
Ulysses knew this danger and temptation lay ahead, so he had his crew seal their ears with wax and tie him to the mast of the ship. He ordered them that no matter what he said—no matter how much he begged—they were not to untie him.
As a kid, I knew I wanted to provide more for my family than I had growing up. I wanted to be successful so my kids would never have to endure days without electricity, water, or, worse, experience the pain of divorce like I had to. I was also keenly aware of my shortcomings—the ones that, if left unaddressed, would cause me to fail in all these areas:
– I liked to party (a lot)!
– I lacked self-confidence.
– I lacked discipline.
– I had serious trouble focusing in school.
– I got bored with jobs easily.
– I lacked the motivation to dive deep into any one subject, unless I enjoyed it.
I remember asking myself, “Sean, what can you do to tie yourself to the mast so that your shortcomings are no longer a problem for you?”
1. Find a strong, ambitious wife! Someone who holds you to high standards, has faith, comes from a close family, and keeps you accountable and dedicated to success. Thanks, Monica, for being that for me!
2. Join the military! It would force me to develop self-discipline and improve my confidence at the same time. It would teach me patience and perseverance as there’s no “job hopping” once you’ve signed your life away.
3. Find a career you love doing! I knew sales was fun for me, every customer a new challenge and they would keep my interest for a long time! Starting my own business was and still has been the ultimate challenge!
- Get into a career that demands constant learning – As a coach, I must always be learning and improving so I can help the people I coach do the same. Stagnation is not an option for me now.
- Take on responsibility for others – When you serve a team of employees and know their success hinges on your effort, focus, and follow-through, it unlocks another level of commitment. That’s why I’ve hired amazing employees whom I care about like family. No amount of boredom or redundancy can ever make me complacent or allow me to fail them.
I know that your goals and shortcomings are not the same as mine. The point I’m making here is this: You can accomplish whatever you want in life, but you must first be clear about what you want. You need to then take inventory of your shortcomings. Finally, you need to create non-negotiable commitments (Ulysses’ Accords) that force you—against your own damn will—to do whatever it takes to succeed!
Tie yourself to the mast. Yes, you will cry out in agony. No, it won’t be easy. But it will be rewarding. You will become better and stronger for what you’ve put yourself through. And you will inspire and change the lives of others for the better. Your example will positively impact those you love most, and you will live with confidence, fulfillment, and no regrets. It will also make God smile, and His gifts will rain down upon you.
“By the sweat of your face you shall eat bread, till you return to the ground, for out of it you were taken; for you are dust, and to dust you shall return.”
[Genesis 3:19](https://www.esv.org/verses/Gen3.19)
“Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.”
[James 1:2-4](https://www.esv.org/verses/James1.2-4)